Accountable

I discovered this evening in a conversation with my daughters that something I said once in the midst of saying the opposite something a thousand times was the thing for which I was held accountable.
 
Now, as a parent, I should know that kids never forget anything you say. Even as toddlers, they manage to repeat the words you don't want them to or the not so nice things you said about someone in the privacy of your own home. Even at a young age, kids make you accountable for pretty much every word you utter, whether it was said intentionally, or in the heat of battle, or when you were barely even awake in the morning.
 
The good news, I suppose, is that, while they are essentially just looking out for their own needs, kids remind us that we are, in fact, accountable for a whole lot of what we do every day. They keep us honest in a way that many of us would never be on our own. They hold us accountable. How we handle the fallout from what we've said or done may be what takes the time and effort, but owning that we said or did it in the first place is really the hardest part.
 
When I was a PA, there were many things for which I was held accountable, most of which were things over which I had little control. I had to estimate scene times, despite the fact that actors could perform the same scene completely differently from one time to the next.  I was called upon to make sure cast was ready, despite variables of costume and makeup and oversleeping that I couldn't change. And yet, I learned along the way how to change the things I could and at least manage those I couldn't. Even if there were times when I probably shouldn't have been held accountable, I discovered that accountability was as much a function of good management as it was a function of personal integrity.
 
My kids would never let me get away with such platitudes. They would just remind me that I said what I said, and that it was now my responsibility to give them what I said I would.
 
Perhaps from now on, I should be a little more careful about what I say. Especially in front of the kids. I am likely to be held accountable.