Ever since my involuntary (not always unpleasant, just involuntary) transition to being a stay-at-home mom, a chunk of my day has been dedicated to the dropping off and picking up of children. I wait inside and outside of schoolyards, I wait for afterschool to let out, and today, I am waiting for a school bus, which, if all goes well, will appear with my son--his first school bus ride home, since he now goes to school across town. This morning when I waited, the bus that was supposed to take him to school never came. "Oh, no, nobody told you?" I subsequently found out. "That bus stop has been moved to another block. Oops." So I wait this afternoon, the situation largely out of my control, fingers crossed that lightning won't strike twice.
When I was working, there was very little waiting. With so much TV to shoot and edit each day, there was no choice but to be "full speed ahead." It was, in fact, part of my job to find things we could do if what we were scheduled to do was delayed. Crew down time was wasted money, so anyone who could minimize waiting was practically a hero. But now, at the bus stop and in my life as a freelancer/job hunter, I wait for things I can't control.
I wait for but can't control when an HR manager will read the resume I emailed or analyze the data in my online application. I wait for but can't control whether or not I will get hired for reality work so that the people who want me to have reality experience before they hire me will see that I have some. And I wait for but can't really control when my unemployed friends and I will be back to working, either together or in different places.
I would like to be the AD or Director or Stage Manager who moves the waiting along, but instead, here I am, with a bunch of other moms, on a corner looking for a school bus I can't control. Tomorrow, maybe I will be able to control some of the things I'm waiting for. For today, I'm a lady in waiting.
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