Nonstop

No, I am not on a plane.  Just at home.  Except today, I had an editing client here working through an almost final cut with me.  From 9:30 to 4.  Nonstop.
 
I didn't have lunch.  I didn't read emails.  I basically didn't move from the editing system for six and a half hours.  Except for it not being a dark room, it was a lot like a control room day at One Life to Live.  Completely all-consuming, shutting out everything else (including all the personal errands and phone calls my husband would remind me at day's end were still undone).
 
Today's nonstop was unpaid.  Which is not great.  But it was great.  Great to be so wrapped up in the editing, great to be so focused on collaborating with the producer.  Great to feel as though, by the end of the time, we had actually made our product better.
 
People are constantly asking me what I want to do.  In both personal and professional settings, I am called upon to name a job title or a job description that would be my Holy Grail. It's not an easy question for me to answer.  Neither my previous job nor my current (or anytime?) brain ever forced me to do just one thing.  Maybe that makes me the luckiest person in the world (even if, when I answer the question, it makes me seem like the most scattered person in the world!)
 
What I really want is today's feeling, just the paid version. Not necessarily editing, and not necessarily in my own home in sock feet.  Just nonstop, so that for the period of time that I am working to finish something, I can happily shut out the rest of the world.  Nonstop, so that I can be a completely honest and open collaborator.  Nonstop, so that when my work day is over, I can know that I was part of getting something made.  Nonstop, so that the exhaustion I feel when I have to catch up on all those personal calls and errands after work is a good exhaustion. Nonstop, so I can be surrounded by people who can also think nonstop.
 
So, as for what I want to do, here it is--I don't care what it's called.  Just make it nonstop.