Beyond My Control

When I first became a booth PA, I quickly learned that I was to be judged, at least in part, on things over which I had no control. You see, a large portion of the job was predicting, based on rehearsal, how long scenes would run when they were taped. That information would allow producers and directors to make cuts in material that was too long or add to material that was too short early in the day, so that cast and crew had time to process the changes. In the days when editing was linear, and therefore more cumbersome, it just wasn't that cost-effective or artistically effective to "fix it in the edit," so the PA's predictions, and then timing of the taped reality, were important.
 
The problem was, quite often rehearsal bore no resemblance to performance on tape. Actors were unlikely to run a fast scene at full speed in a basement rehearsal hall or to shed tears and take halting breaths in an emotional one at seven o'clock in the morning. And, as I used to say, the time of even the most basic scenes could change based on what the actors had had for lunch. Yet, it was up to the PA to predict what would happen, and I took that responsibility very seriously.
 
Flash forward a bunch of years, and I am still taking seriously both the things I can control and the things I can't. These days, it's not so much about how an actor will play something, but I continue to be surrounded by pieces and parts that are beyond my control.
 
The difference, I suppose, is that after all these years, I am a little more able to see that things are not my fault, and a little more able to move on once I've apologized and learned something. The lunacy of PA time prediction may be a funny story now, but back then, it struck fear into those of us entrusted with a stopwatch. These days, there is still a serious work ethic, just not as much fear (and a whole lot more perspective).
 
I guess we learn over time that "out of our control" is just how some things are. And that the best that we can do is predict, adjust, learn, apologize when necessary, and then JUST MOVE ON.