I spent most of my day with my daughter at an audition. She is of an age now that I don't always go with her, but it was the weekend, and she needed a parent there, and before I knew it, a large part of the day had passed with us there.
Were there things at home that I should have been doing? Probably. Did she need me there every minute of the five hours? Probably not. But when I thought about our day, it was actually with some gratitude for the fact that I had spent time "in the trench" with her. I was not singing or dancing, or preparing what I might say, as she was, but I was there, doing some of the waiting, and looking around at other auditionees, as she must do each time she goes to an audition.
While I have, over the years, been the parent who might stay up all night with a crying infant, I am generally not the parent who stays up till all hours with a teenager completing homework. What I realized today is that "staying up," whether your child is an infant or a teenager, "being there" for what matters to them, is just as important as being "in the trench" with a director was when I was working as an AD. You see things you wouldn't see otherwise. You understand in a way you can't possibly from just hearing a story afterward.
Does this mean I'll be staying up to help with, or at least supervise, late night homework? Not necessarily. But perhaps it will take me to a few more places with my now older children, rather than just to the places I had to take them when they were younger. Because sometimes being there matters, whether you're driving the drop-off car, or just going along for the ride.
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