My kids are not little anymore. I don't carry small human beings in my
arms or strapped to my chest or on my shoulders, yet, some days, I am
exhausted as if I do. You would think that life would be simpler when
kids take care of their own bodily needs, pack their own backpacks,
sometimes even travel on their own. Simpler in some ways, maybe. But
in others, way more complicated. And way more exhausting.
The thing about babies is that, even if you keep them on a schedule, it
is a schedule set by you. Where you go, they go. Or if they have to
nap at home, you arrange accordingly. No matter what the equation,
you're in it. While crying fits or explosive poop may make it seem that
they are in control, in the end, you are the one who pulls it all
together, who keeps it in control.
Now that my kids are older, there are days when I very clearly feel as
though I am no longer in control. They go off to school each day and
have interactions that I may not even hear about. They have interests
and activities, which certainly make them fascinating people, but which
also have me running all over town. We are no longer parents with children. We are a
household with five completely different sets of needs, and let's face
it, it's not easy to meet one person's needs, much less five people's.
No wonder I'm tired.
I don't see our schedule getting any simpler anytime soon, so I'm
prepared. But here's the question--do I tell my friends who are
struggling through lack of sleep babyhood that the tiredness will just
pretend to go away, yet sneak back just when they feel they are
re-taking control of their lives? Do I warn them to pace themselves and
to beware of letting their kids pursue all their interests?
Nah, they'll just have to discover this for themselves. It's more fun that way. And anyway, I'm too tired!
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